Fatherhood

My father shaped my life.

Now I love my mother. She's taught me skills that I'd never give up in a million years. However, so has my dad. I've always been a daddy's girl, from an age where he could hold my head in his palm. Because of this, I've learned skills from him that I'd never trade.

First, I learned humility from him. My family life has never been perfect, but through it all, he's been patient and humble and tried to teach me to do the same. Now, I've learned how to accept when I'm wrong, or even when there's just nothing I can do, apologize, and help heal relationships when I might have let anger fester.

Second, I learned communication from him. Girls have a way of talking in circles, which among girls isn't too bad, but with guys, becomes downright confusing. Because of this, I was taught to say just what I mean with no games. How often this has saved my tail in conversations and avoided potential problems! He knows well how to use manipulation, but taught me to make sure my communication wasn't laced with deceit, but instead was done with honesty and plainness.

Third, he taught me to think. While a lot of girls run on emotions first, I was taught to use logic instead. This skill, while strange, has helped to protect me in a lot of situations. I think through every potential danger until I have a solution. This has helped me manage all sorts of issues in my life, including how to succeed in school. I may be a girl, but not thinking like one has saved my tail countless times.

I'm far too well aware of how often men are unimportant in anyone's lives. With feminist movements saying we don't need men, or with mothers trying to earn a greater income and the privilege to work, it feels like the world is getting out of balance yet again. The saddest part about this, is that statistics show this as a negative trend in families.

For instance, I'm sure it makes sense to a lot of people that if you are in a family, and the father is working, the mother could work as well, and it would give them a greater income, right? Well the math is a little weird here. Statistics show that if a guy is earning $42,000, and the woman earns $22,000, they're actually earning $40,500. This is because of so many other costs in addition to the new income. For one, the costs involved in getting a job, commuting, etc. She's PAYING for the privilege to work.

This is also a problem because of outside spending. When people have more money, they tend to spend more money. Rarely does their comfort of living stay the same.

Plus, what's happening to the kids while this is going on? Nothing good, I'm afraid. Without parents at home, they start to disconnect and rely on their friends instead. If they're young enough, parents might get them to a day care, but then they associate day care with home, not their actual home. Even if they aren't being cared for by someone else, they'll struggle to connect with a working mother a lot more than they will with a working father.

Why? Because women think differently about work than men do. If you recall the comedic comparison of a man being waffles and a women being spaghetti, it has an element of truth. When women work, they bring work home with them. They can't just slide it to the side and think of it later, it will be going through their mind all the time and distracting them from the rest of their family.

In addition to that, women view work as fun. They socialize and mingle, some women even decide to work because they crave this outside interaction. However for men, it's a job. There's nothing fun about it, and they look forward to coming home and being able to relax.

Besides, a lot of times, people date in work environments. With women putting a focus on the social aspect of work, you better believe that the likelihood of affairs increases.

A great majority of men view fatherhood as their most important job, and yet more view their jobs as a necessary evil, but a privilege to help provide for a family. How is it fair to anyone to take that privilege away from them in the name of "I want to." They are a huge influence in families in more ways than I've listed here, and I know I would never trade my father for anything in the world. Would you?